DBZ Shorts Humor
by Trukero
Summary: Just a bunch of random DBZ spoofs ranging from Goku going on a hunting trip to the Z gang going to College. Hope you enjoy. New story added!
1. Goku's got a Gun!

Goku's got a Gun!

A/N: This is my first comedy fanfic tell me what you think.

Goku woke up early one morning; he had to because he and Vegeta were going hunting that day. He jumped out of bed and got changed into his hunting gear, a camouflage jacket, a pair of jeans, and an orange hunting cap. He then went and grabbed his 12 gauge pump shotgun.

After he was dressed walked out and got into his car and drove over to Capsule Corp. to pick Vegeta up. Vegeta was waiting outside on the driveway when Goku pulled in. He was wearing full camouflaged uniform and carrying a rifle on his shoulder. Goku then opened the door.

"Well let's hurry Kakarot or the deer and fowl will be gone." Vegeta said.

"Jeese Vegeta you're in a cranky mood." Goku replied as he hit the accelerator and headed towards the hunting grounds.

Once there Goku and Vegeta got their stuff out and headed into the forest. They walked for minutes until they came to a clear opening. They then hid outside the opening in some nearby foliage. After waiting twenty minutes Goku spotted something which looked like a deer, he could barely tell, but took his 12 gauge and fired. The figure quickly fell and out came a human scream. Goku ran over to the spot and it was none other than his son Gohan.

"Oh my god!" Goku exclaimed as he looked in horror at what he had done, "I'm so sorry Gohan, we'd better get you to a doctor fast. Vegeta!"

Quickly Vegeta came rushing in with his rifle in his hand.

"Kakarot you moron what have you done!" Vegeta shouted as he looked at the blood dripping from Gohan's wound.

"There's no time to explain grab Gohan and I'll go pull up the car." Goku replied as he ran toward the direction of the car.

About ten minutes later Goku returned with the car and quickly opened the back doors. Vegeta put the unconscious Gohan into the seat and got in the front. They quickly drove to the nearest hospital and Gohan was rushed to the E.R.

"So tell me Kakarot, what did happen?" Vegeta asked.

"I thought he was a deer and took the shot." Goku quickly responded, "I'd better call Chi Chi, won't she be pissed when she finds out about Gohan."

Goku then walked over to the phone and called his house number. Screaming could be heard over the receiver as Goku winced at every shout. An hour later Chi Chi and Goten arrived. Chi Chi had anguish written all over her face as she walked in.

"Goku if our son dies I'll kill you myself, you got that!" She screamed at him.

At about the same time the surgeon came out with a grim look on his face.

"I've got some good news and some bad. The good is he'll live, the bad is he's paralyzed and we can't do a thing about it." The surgeon said.

Chi Chi walked out the doors in tears and Goku walked out to comfort her.

"Hey, it'll be alright. I mean at least he's not dead or anything." Goku said in a calm voice.

"No it won't, he'll never be the great the scholar I wanted him to be and it's all your fault!" Chi Chi screamed as she turned to Goku.

The son family drove home that night not a word was said. A week later Chi Chi filed for divorce and Goku was found wandering the streets.

Moral of the story is never give a gun to an naïve idiot.


	2. Piccolo the Pervert

Piccolo the Pervert

Outside the Son residence, Piccolo is seen floating above a grassy patch staring into the 8 year old Gohan's house.

"_I'll always watch after you kid."_ Piccolo thought as he watched Gohan get changed into his clothes and then jumping into his bed.

Piccolo quickly leaves for Kami's lookout where he'd plan staying for this night. Flying through the night Piccolo thinks of how nice and soft Gohan's tush looked tonight as he changed into his underpants.

Soon Piccolo stops at Kami's lookout and finds one of the empty houses in which to rest.

The Namek wakes up in his sleep, he can't get the thoughts out of how awesomely hot Gohan's butt looked.

"_I need to go grab that thing."_ Piccolo thinks in his child molesting ways as he takes off for the son residence once again.

More images begin to surge the Namek's thought process as he forces his body to soar faster through the starlit sky. He now remembers when he was training Gohan of how he liked what he looked liked when he was naked and helpless.

Piccolo arrives only to see the final lights being put out, he waits for the moment and soon grasps it as he busts through Gohan's window, pulls down his pants and reaches for the nice fleshy buttocks.

Gohan stirs awake, only to see in horror his former mentor grabbing him on the rear end.

"Ah!" He shrieks as he feels the sharp nails dig in.

Quickly Goku rushes in and drop kicks Piccolo, Chi Chi can only look in horror as she sees what the Namek had planned to do. She reaches for the phone and calls the sheriff's office and tells them what has happened.

"Yes I would like to press charges, would you want some strange green grabbing molester allowed to fly around and grab other children's' butts?!" She yells into the phone.

Piccolo is now being held in a full nelson by his Saiyan rival and Gohan his crying through his traumatizing experiences.

Chi Chi gets off the phone, angry that the authorities say nothing can be done.

"I could always throw him in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber and blast the door, he could never resurface after that." Goku replies to his heart broken wife.

"Then do it!" She screams as she now clutches Gohan in her arms.

Goku uses his instant transmission technique and delivers the Namek to the Hyperbolic Time Chamber, afterwards he uses a ki blast and seals the door, leaving the perverted Namek to his thoughts and images for an enternity.


End file.
